Wednesday Nov 2 2022
8:40PM
I had just gotten off of work; standing at the bus stop the street lights started to fade. Fog was slowly hovering over every branch, engulfing every building from view. Leaning up against the shelter, with one hand in my pocket, the other holding a cigarette that would every so often be raised so I can take a slow long pull, filling my lungs with smoke like the fog that crept closer and closer. No cars had passed by, which felt odd considering I had been there for a good 20 minutes. Oh but what rush am I even in I thought, where I am even headed; knowing I couldn't stay here at this bus stop forever but nothing also awaited me at the end of this route. I decided I should just start walking, the bus will catch up eventually; so into the foggy unknown I went, The cigarette was on its last pull, my ankles and knees on its last strength from all the standing at work; this was a bad idea to walk, I should stop at the next bus stop.
Once I arrived at the next bus shelter, I decided to stop and sit, first by the glass, then shortly after on the curb. Still no cars. The fog continued to envelope everything in sight, hugging everything that the eyes can see until I doubted whether even myself could be discerned within the fog. Would I too not be a product of this slaughter of sight? In a corner far deep in the recesses of my stomach, a panic arose; what if I were to never be seen again? Witnesses would describe how they saw a young man sitting on a curb only to never reappear. I found pleasure in that thought, who would really miss me if this fog that unforgiveably dissolves every atom of existence, magically took me for its own. That thought entrapped me for a time unknown; by the time I came out of this nightly day dream, I realized the fog had started to dissipate - still no cars had passed - but what truly awoke me from the mental slumber was that the world materializing before me, was not in fact the world I remembered to be there. These oddly shaped trees had taken over the semi naked branches, the flickering lights from the buildings in the distance no longer shone - as if the fog had swallowed it all up and spat out the remains; regurgitated reality. I tried to stand but my legs had given up, the bus shelter behind me was replaced with a hauntingly lopsided house, battered up and old. Black crows sat on the naked branches, a new world stood before me, as I was unable to stand before it.
A part of me was relieved, for in the last few days all I had wanted was to be neither here nor there. I thought for a second deep down maybe I had died, a car or my bus had come speeding out of the fog and knocked me dead. I couldn't really know for sure, I patted my jacket where my cigarettes were, none were to be found. It was like a scary movie, except the ghost was my own shadow in the streetlight. I put my head down, finally able to relax in the recess of my depressive thoughts, closed my eyes, and faintly could hear the rumbling of a car close by ...
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